About commenting

NOTE: If you leave a comment on this blog that is rude, insulting, hostile, and/or hateful, please know that it will be deleted unread. All your work? Will be for naught. FYI, and etc.

Carry on.


The biggest reason I feared blogging, back when I feared blogging, was the comments. The vast majority of blog commenting sections that I’ve come across have been very unpleasant places, indeed, and I wanted no part of that.

In the meantime, though, I have found places, good places, where commenters behave as people are meant to behave in real life — politely, respectfully, and often with kindness. These experiences showed me that I need not fear — as long as I have rules!

And so:

The Rules for Commenting on In My Head

Rule #1: Be a person. Be polite. Be respectful. Be kind if you can. Treat others as you would have them treat you. Etc, etc, etc.

Rule #2: Know your stuff. If you’re going to add information to the discussion, or disagree with me or another commenter on facts, come armed. Bring links, bring supportive evidence. Don’t just be contrary — know what you’re talking about, and please try to prove it. I go to the trouble to provide a lot of links. Please do the same, when you can.

Rule #3: Give the benefit of the doubt. Unless and until you know that someone is being asshole, assume that they are not. Ask before you insist, clarify before you argue. The comments on my site don’t always move all that quickly, but people do come back regularly — if you ask, they’re likely to answer!

Rule #4: Whenever possible, be funny. Because funny is the very nectar of the gods, that’s why!

Rule #5: Remember that the comments do not necessarily reflect the views of the blogger.

Rule #6: If I determine that you are not being sufficiently polite and respectful, I will cut you off at the knees. And your comment will be removed.

Rule #7: Did I mention be polite? How about kind? Did I mention kind? Please.

Really not that onerous, right? All righty then, go out there and have fun, you crazy kids. And thank you, very much, for being here!

For an example of what’s not acceptable, please click here (and please also read my response, if you’re so inclined!).

(Oh, and – Update: For an explanation of why I’ve used that little golden hand to illustrate this page, please read here!)


  1. hello.kitty

     /  December 4, 2009

    Hello Emily, AKA ellaesther!

    Sorry I did not respond in a timely manner to message two seasons ago! Have finally clicked on your blog and am eager to read it!

    Have had a very tough 2009 and am looking forward to the year ending. Hope all is well with you!

    Hello Kitty FOREVER!*

    Yo, I been a HK fan for over two decades so ‘intercourse you’ Mariah Carey, Kimora Lee Simmons, and Paris Hilton!

  2. Scott Schear

     /  January 31, 2012

    Hi Emily,
    I’ve re-posted you piece “…Monotheism’s Greatest Mistake.” on http://www.seeinginword.wordpress.com. I omit the beginning of your title as I did not find your work to be blasphemous. I used your work, with appropriate credit and citation, to complement a piece called “What is Faith?” A work that too might be deemed unsavory in some circles. I appreciate the originality of your work and that was my greatest motivation for it’s inclusion.
    Peace… Scott

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