About commenting

The biggest reason I feared blogging, back when I feared blogging, was the comments. The vast majority of blog commenting sections that I’ve come across have been very unpleasant places, indeed, and I wanted no part of that.

Over the past year and a half, though, I have found places, good places, where commenters behave as people are meant to behave in real life — politely, respectfully, and often with kindess. These experiences showed me that I need not fear — as long as I have rules!

And so:

The Rules for Commenting on In My Head

Rule #1: Be a person. Be polite. Be respectful. Be kind if you can. Treat others as you would have them treat you. Etc, etc, etc.

Rule #2: Know your stuff. If you’re going to add information to the discussion, or disagree with me or another commenter on facts, come armed. Bring links, bring supportive evidence. Don’t just be contrary — know what you’re talking about, and please try to prove it. I go to the trouble to provide a lot of links. Please do the same, when you can.

Rule #3: Give the benefit of the doubt. Unless and until you know that someone is being asshole, assume that they are not. Ask before you insist, clarify before you argue. The comments on my site don’t yet move all that quickly, but people do come back regularly — if you ask, they’re likely to answer!

Rule #4: Whenever possible, be funny. Because funny is the very nectar of the gods, that’s why!

Rule #5: Remember that the comments do not necessarily reflect the views of the blogger. This is important, because of Rule #6.

Rule #6: The blogger will not participate in the commenting. I have decided that in terms of my own need for structure and sanity, the comments section is for commenters, the posts are for me. It will go very badly for me if I find myself in comment section arguments on my own site ( “know yourself” – also a good rule, generally!) and if I issue a blanket ban on myself, I won’t be tempted.

Caveat #6.1: In the interests of fairness, the blogger will occasionally answer questions and/or respond to commenters’ expressed needs/desires/ requests in the body of a post. Because I’m a peach of a gal, I am, and don’t want to be too anal about my non-participation clause.

Rule #7: If I determine that you are not being sufficiently polite and respectful, I will cut you off at the knees. And your comment will be removed.

Rule #8: Did I mention be polite? How about kind? Did I mention kind? Please.

Really not that onerous, right? All righty then, go out there and have fun, you crazy kids. And thank you, very much, for being here!